You probably know contentment is a beneficial perspective, but sometimes contentment can get confused with complacency, blissful happiness or that one-time feeling you had as a child at Christmas. 

Sometimes to learn what something is, it’s helpful to unpack what something is not. Check out these three things that contentment is not.

Contentment is not complacency.

“Contentment” and “complacency” may sound similar, but they’re not synonyms. Contentment takes active perspective work while complacency is more sedentary. 

A person who is content is striving to be grateful while recognizing the honest challenges in life and working to better themselves and those around them. When things don’t go according to plan, they rest knowing that they did take action, and they meet each new day with its unique challenges. 

A person who is complacent simply approaches life with a “this is the way things are, let’s chill here” mentality. There’s limited to no active work to better themselves and others. They simply accept things as they are. 

To learn more about the nuances of contentment and complacency, read this blog.

Contentment is not the absence of difficulty.

It’s easy to think that if you were in a certain envisioned position, you would be content. Picture your dream scenario at the time and think “If I had or was this, I would be content.”

The truth is that there will always be something difficult in our lives. Sometimes the difficulty is the equivalent of an annoying splinter and sometimes it’s debilitating pain. There is always a challenge in life, no matter what you look like, where you live, what your family is like, or how much money you have.

Content people are honest about life’s challenges, but they know what’s in their control and what’s out of their control. Amid the difficulty, content people are doing the mental perspective work of practicing gratitude, letting go of the past, thinking of their life values and reminding themselves of how they’re living out those values. 

You can cry and be content.

Contentment is not achieved and then forgotten about.

Contentment isn’t “been there done that.” You don’t sit in a state of contentment one time and then call yourself content. And truthfully, you’ll probably go back and forth between discontentment and contentment. Or, be content in one area of your life but be discontent in another. For example, content at your job but discontent in where you live. 

The takeaway here is that contentment will be a continuous process. It’s an everyday practice, not an infrequent holiday.