Don't Fall for Competitive Discontentment
When I was a kid, my family moved to a new neighborhood. In this new neighborhood, kids had upgraded toys from my old neighborhood. No more bikes. These new neighborhood kids had electric scooters and golf carts.
I suddenly felt the need to change my allowance savings plan and birthday gift list. I was all in for a red electric scooter. Goodbye inline skates. I wanted to be like the other kids and have an electric scooter to cruise through the neighborhood on. I felt like a scooter meant cool kid, and I needed to be cooler than them, so for starters I need to be as cool as them.
Comparison ➡️ Competition ➡️ Discontentment ➡️ Change to Inauthentic Goals
What was your red electric scooter experience?
When did you change your goal due to competitive discontentment instead of personal conviction?
Competitive discontentment happens when you feel inadequate unless you are winning. You compare yourself with others and constantly try to outperform. Unfortunately, contentment is damaged in this process. And, often competitive discontentment results in a change of goals. It makes us chase after things that aren’t authentic to who we are.
Competition can be healthy. It can drive discipline, innovation, focus, and motivation.
Yet, competition can also be a distraction if it’s misplaced.
As adults, we can add competition to everything from potlucks to job titles to body image to home aesthetic to how intelligent our kids are. Overdoing it with competition is like taking the wrong amount of the right prescription. Instead of all the benefits of healthy competition, you’ll experience a host of side effects. Instead of discipline, you’ll feel tired. Instead of innovation, you’ll copy to keep up. Instead of focus, you’ll feel distracted. Instead of motivation, you’ll feel stressed.
You don’t benefit from competition in every area of life.
Recognize when comparison is about to lead to competitive discontentment. Ask yourself questions like the ones below:
Who will benefit from me being competitive in this area?
What’s my life vision? Does comparison or competition in this area benefit my life vision or distract from it?
Am I distracted from my goals right now? Why?
Am I trying to copy someone else or am I experiencing healthy competition?
Be authentic with yourself and identify when you are falling victim to comparison leading to competitive discontentment. Instead of putting energy into keeping up, put your energy into the life vision you have for yourself. Competition is sure to arise, just make sure it’s in the areas that help, not the ones that distract.
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